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Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Went through some hiccup today too, well life isnt always very smooth sailing.

Woke up and i know this is the day. Poster presentation! Everything is like a mess and profs are not very happy with the prototype. Alot of thisjust crop up along this fw months and deep in my heart i know this is the music i have to face at the end. Sounds very noob but really almost on the verge of tearing but still standing strong. Will just accept fate if it means i need to take six modules for next sem when results are out.

After this presentation, set off alone to sci canteen, etaing alone and mugging alone. Enjoy my time alone though as i can focus better(: tiredness and mostly laziness sets in and i start to sit back. Then, i saw this cleaning auntie grumbling. A bad day it must be, i thought. Then she came and wipe my table. I say a simple thank you and she start to say to me in chinese" you are welcome. Finals coming huh? Must be very tough studying," and she smiled at me. For a moment, I felt encouraged by her. There is this understanding in her smile that warms me and motivates me to keep puching on.

Went for VCF sunset prayer at engine bridge. First time attending and it was quite an experience(:

Then comes my favourite floorballgame! Yay got a few brusies for me to press! Haha. Today i sense a slight improvement in me as i pushed myself to step up and have some self confidence. But towards the end, i went back to my old self, shying away and defend. Somehow there is this barrier inside me preventing me to be confident that i can receive a pass and give a good pass too. It is very difficult to shake off this low self esteem inside me as pass memories keep flooding back. In the past people used to criticise me when i play ball games and this slowly forms a thought inside me that i cant do it. But IFG is coming up, and this is the first time i a determined in acheveing something especially in the sport which i really like.

Alrites going to conquer mountains of notes! AAAGGGGRRRR! A warrior never gives up and feelings cant dominate or stop me from doing anything! GOGOGO!

writtern @8:49 AM